Admist my drunken state on Saturday, I was reminded how it felt to be so enamored by somebody. I hadn’t seen let alone hung out with IA in the longest time. Everyone knows I have no romantic feelings for this friend of mine, even though when I say I love him I do not mean it in a simple manner what so ever. You know what happens when you love people, the way you look at them is different. There is a twinkle in your eye and it is so obvious that you are so happy for their existence and anything they do you will love. He is such a great person and he treats people wonderfully and honestly I am so jealous of whoever gets to marry him because they will get so much love and respect. I thought this post would be longer, but I just wanted to express the emotions I felt. It’s like nobody else was there because I was with him which sounds very romantic/cheesy but I don’t even mean it like that. I just love him so much, i’m so happy he is alive and I am so happy I got to spend that much time with him. I miss the security of the platonic sleepovers and waking up next to somebody who cares about me and has no hidden agenda. I think the two friend-elationships have taught me that 1. it is possible for boys to treat me with the respect and attention I deserve (although I’m still waiting on that to be combined with hooking up lmao) 2. I have to stop being content with hooking up with powerful people who don’t know my last name. Okay thats all for now. Deuces.